Mum...

Mum was awake the day before yesterday and she opened her eyes to see all of us. Though she has got no response, we believed that she can hear everyone of us. Towards the evening, because she has got no sedation, she became breathless. Even so, she still struggled to open her eyes to call. My heart really ache and pain to see her like that. I can feel how much pain she is going through and yet she is still hanging on. Fighting hard.
I really regretted never take good care of her in the past. I... I dont know what to say. My heart feel so ache every moment I see her. She started gasping towards the late evening hence Dr put her back on sedation with paralysis agent. Yesterday morning her breathing was so much better and she looks more comfortable.
One of my auntie which is my mum's elder sister came to visit her yesterday. She asked me whether I sang for my mother because my mother loves to sing and she likes music. I said I didnt, maybe I can bring one MP3 for her but dont know whether they allow. Immediately after I finished my sentence, she walked close to mum, brushed her hair and started singing. She sang those oldies songs of "Zhou Xuan" where my mother and her used to sing together when they were young. It was a very touching scene and my tears flowed... I was very impressed with auntie's action. She sang continuously for about 20 songs and she was not even feeling a bit shy. She just want to do something for mum, wants to wake her up. My other aunties and uncles came in and all were in tears.
I am grateful for the past week over the concern and actions of my mum's siblings. They have been very supportive. Someone would stay overnight with me to make sure that I am not alone in the hospital. They will drop by and buy me lunch everyday eventhough they are working.
They will meet me and drive me out for dinner to make sure that I have something more appetitising than those hospital food. One of my uncle even brought ingredients to brew me tonic soup on his working days. I am very touched by their actions. They consistently keep mum and myself company everyday. Like mum said, it's very lucky to have this group of siblings, if there is next life, she wanted to be in the same family with them again.... and of course I did not forget the support from my friends and colleagues. Thanks for visiting mum...
Dr updated us, her condition is neither here nor there. I do not know what to do. I do not want to give up. I hope she will be able to wean off the ventilator and I will just take her home to take care of her eventhough she is not able to move or what so ever. I have never been so lost in my life.......
How come she has to suffer like this? Why?